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by ricardian
Wed Mar 27, 2024 4:51 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Spider: Why are you terrified by me?
Human: Well, all the reasons that I did have, have now been replaced by the fact that you can talk
by ricardian
Wed Mar 27, 2024 2:34 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Some birds produce an oil that helps their feathers to retain more body heat. This fact generated the well-known saying "the oily bird gets the warm".
by ricardian
Mon Mar 25, 2024 5:54 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Although George Wilkinson did very poorly at school and lacked many of the social graces, he turned out to be a gifted portrait artist and his fame grew very quickly. Soon people from all over the country were coming to him to have their portrait painted. One day, a beautiful young woman pulled up t...
by ricardian
Sun Mar 24, 2024 7:33 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

The wind was rough
And cold and blough.
She kept he hands inside her mough
And so, although
The wind did blough
And the weather was a cruel fough,
She gave a cough.
Please do not scough,
She coughed until her hat blough ough!
by ricardian
Fri Mar 22, 2024 8:43 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

A stingy millionaire stipulated in his will that his wife must bury him with all his money in the coffin.
After the funeral his wife's friend asked "You didn't really bury him with all his money did you?"
"Oh yes, I did!" she replied. "I wrote a cheque and stuffed it into his shroud."
by ricardian
Fri Mar 22, 2024 1:04 pm
Forum: Aviation Design, Manufacture and Maintenance
Topic: One Big Ass Plane
Replies: 4
Views: 195
Gender:

Re: One Big Ass Plane

A maybe apocryphal story told by Christopher Cockerell (inventor of the hovercraft). He was visited by 'the MOD', anxious to secure the concept for military use. Cockerell asked what they would require it to do as they already had Land Rovers and 3-tonners. He explained that hover height was relate...
by ricardian
Fri Mar 22, 2024 12:43 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

More on the Sanday shipwreck (from this week's edition of The Orcadian)
Image
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 10:46 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

tango15 wrote:
Wed Mar 20, 2024 10:21 pm
My local supermarket has run out of easter eggs, Ricardian. Could you pop over to the next island and buy some for me please? :))
https://news.sky.com/story/sanday-shop- ... d-13098797
Failed to check the DofQ
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 9:59 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Patient has just been given bad news about his prognosis.
Patient: "Doctor, just how long do I have to live?"
Doctor: "Five..."
Patient: "Five what? Days, weeks, months?"
Doctor: "Four, three,...
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 9:39 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

.....The fire service came and checked the house out to see if we were safe enough apparantly smoke alarms et al were all working ok. Suggested we got an extra carbon monoxide detector for upstairs, so we have..... Fire regs changed in Scotland a couple of years ago. In every home you legally now h...
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 9:10 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Precocious Child: "Mummy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy's stomach last night?" Mother: "I've got to do that or Daddy's belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny." PC: "I don't think that's going to work." M: "Why not?" PC: "Because Mrs Jones from next door keeps blowing him back up ever...
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 8:52 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

Whitehall village, the harbour & Papa Stronsay basking in the sun today (Wed 20 Mar). https://stronsaylimpet.co.uk/WhitehallMarionMiller.jpg (Photo taken from the Islander by Marion Miller) Mistakenly posted to the "Jokes" thread earlier today! And chez Ricardian as indicated by the arrow: https://...
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 8:47 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

Whitehall village, the harbour & Papa Stronsay basking in the sun today (Wed 20 Mar).
Image
(Photo taken from the Islander by Marion Miller)

Mistakenly posted to the "Jokes" thread earlier today!
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 8:43 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

ricardian wrote:
Wed Mar 20, 2024 6:04 pm
Whitehall village, the harbour & Papa Stronsay basking in the sun today (Wed 20 Mar).
Image
(Photo taken from the Islander by Marion Miller)
Sorry folks, wrong forum!
by ricardian
Wed Mar 20, 2024 6:04 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Whitehall village, the harbour & Papa Stronsay basking in the sun today (Wed 20 Mar).
Image
(Photo taken from the Islander by Marion Miller)
by ricardian
Tue Mar 19, 2024 8:47 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Doctor: How many times do you exercise?
Me: 3 times.
Doctor: A week? A month?
Me: I have given my answer.
by ricardian
Tue Mar 19, 2024 4:47 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Friday Jokes
Replies: 10857
Views: 469596
Gender:

Re: Friday Jokes

Image
by ricardian
Tue Mar 19, 2024 3:49 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V
Replies: 19370
Views: 977080
Gender:

Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

Ooh, you are posh. My schedule tomorrow: 12:50 Leave home, drive to Ilkeston Community Hospital 13:20 Ten minute walk around the perimeter to the clinic (Floor by main door lifted re floods) 13:30 Ultrasound scan 13:40 Back home to lunch. My schedule yesterday (Mon 18 Mar): 08:40 Taxi to ferry 08:5...
by ricardian
Tue Mar 12, 2024 2:30 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Photos of Everybody
Replies: 316
Views: 49616
Gender:

Re: Photos of Everybody

llondel wrote:
Tue Mar 12, 2024 1:03 am
Errrr...

Screenshot_20240311_180205.png
Why have I only just noticed that!
by ricardian
Mon Mar 11, 2024 9:09 pm
Forum: Crewroom
Topic: Photos of Everybody
Replies: 316
Views: 49616
Gender:

Re: Photos of Everybody

I just realised (March 2024) that I had put these two photographs all ready to upload in June 2023 (!) but completely forgot about them - probably because they're of my 80th birthday party in June 2023. One is of the very special cake, baked by a local lady who is very skilled at baking and somehow ...