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Question ... Mrs.ExS and myself use the same e-mail address for most of our e-mail traffic. This is provided by a major New Zealand ISP, and when we are away from home can log into the website and read our mail.

Or ... For many years we have used personal Apple iPads when away from home, and have established the ISP as an "account" on the iPads. This has allowed either of us to just open the iPad, select "mail" and download new e-mails. More importantly we can both delete from our iPad stuff that is of no interest to the other without this being deleted from the ISP server.

Not anymore ! Mrs ExS has just given in and bought the latest iPhone, X, loaded with IOS 12.1. This morning she arose before me, downloaded her mail on to her iPhone then deleted stuff that she wasn't interested in - which was promptly deleted from our ISP Server and not then available to me an hour later. We have also discovered that If I too delete from my iPad before she has downloaded to her iPhone, then I too am now deleting from the server as well

Obviously there is something in the settings gone wrong, but what ? The local California Apple Store staff have difficulty even acknowledging the existence of a foreign ISP never mind being interested in sorting this out. It didn’t happen between the two iPads in the past, so what has gone wrong and how can we sort it.

'Tis a puzzlement, said Alice

Later ....when in doubt read the instructions !

Apple directed me to an "advanced" page which gives the option to leave on server, and my iPad appears to have been set up that way totally unknown to me prior to today, but ... it wasn't working this way this morning, so I am still sceptical, but until we have re-united later today and had chance to confuse her iPhone I won't know if this will solve the problem.

ain't technology wonderful ?

Yup. I collect emails on phone, Kindle and Laptop. If I open on the KIndle or Phone, it is no longer available on the Laptop. No question of deleting from the server, it just isn't there anymore. They are set to server never.

If I access my email from Thunderbird on my desktop, it is downloaded and deleted. If I access it any other way, i keep it on the server.

ian - I would have expected a similar setting in Thunderbird to enable you to retain the message on the server if you wish to?

Yup! Here it is
https://support.tigertech.net/thunderbird-lmos

Boac wrote: ↑

Fri Jul 12, 2019 12:49 pm

ian - I would have expected a similar setting in Thunderbird to enable you to retain the message on the server if you wish to?

Yup! Here it is
https://support.tigertech.net/thunderbird-lmos

Yes; but I want things on my desktop. Everything under MY control.

Now you are confusing me! What is it you actually want to do with your read emails?

Boac wrote: ↑

Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:07 pm

Now you are confusing me! What is it you actually want to do with your read emails?

Some I file, some I delete, the ones I file, I file in an organised manner.

Sorry - i thought you were 'complaining' about it like exsp. Must be the heat

MrsExS returned home with iPhone, no option to "keep on server" exists despite the contrary advice from the Apple 'expert', yet both the iPad and iPhone are both on IOS 12 and the iPad does offer that option. The challenge continues. Not amused.

Exsp - confirm this does not work?
1. On the Home page, open the Settings app.
2. In Settings, tap the Mail, Contacts, and Calendars option.
3. Tap the account you want to edit.
4. Under Outgoing Mail Server, tap the SMTP option.
5. Tap Incoming Settings.
6. Find and update the Delete from Server setting.
Your mail now leaves a copy of the message on the server.

Finally, are you using IMAP or POP for mail?

Another way would be to copy wanted emails to yourself or some account that you have set up to receive copies.

Boac - Thanks will try that. POP 3
G-CPTN - yes, but a bit hammer and walnut

I have just (since first reading this thread) found that a dozen emails in my Hotmail/Outlook have been moved from the Inbox to the Deleted folder - and cannot be recovered and returned to the Inbox - the just remain in the Deleted folder. ! ! ! ! ! !

However, I have used the 'Move' instruction to return them to my Inbox.

Can you not forward them?

Boac wrote: ↑

Fri Jul 12, 2019 9:15 pm

Can you not forward them?

I started to Forward them, then realised I could use the Move function to achieve the desired result.

Boac. Apple staff finally found a "delete from server" option, via Passwords and Accounts, Advanced option, not Mail. - which is where it is on the I Pad, but more hidden on the iPhone. "Never" was already selected, which makes no sense, and re-booting and re-selecting still hasn't achieved the desired result. The iPhone is still removing from server, regardless of the instruction not to.

Fed up with the whole thing, a large Pacific Ocean might soon receive a very expensive new iPhone ( when Mrs ExS isn’t looking ) but thanks anyway.

Not iPhone, but a supercompact camera (a compact camera with extended capabilities that I bought to replace two DSLR cameras).
It has so many options selected by so many levels that I end up with it doing things that I don't want - such as multiple exposures due to some obscure selection that I cannot locate!

"Apple staff finally found a "delete from server" "
That'll teach yer! Stick with Android
a) it's a shed-load cheaper
b) people understand it

Boac ...Tell Mrs ExS !

G-CPTN. I agree, for one who started photography using a brass and mahogany 12x10 'field' camera, complete with black cloth, and glass plates, and on a tripod, it's all too much. I've printed off an 80 page, A4 size "manual" and still can't understand half the functions ! (and of course don't need them ).

And don't start me on cars that switch off the engine at traffic light stops. All Harold Wilson's 'White Hot Heat Of Technology's' fault.