The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV

[Undried Plum]

One would like to think that the crew on these nuclear boats are picked for their intelligence!

Errr. Did you think that one through?

They are picked to exclusively include those who don't think through the consequences of their final and most catastrophic actions.

To them, the phrase "come again" simply means to do the same thing again (called "denote" in their jargon) fifteen more times; and then to think of England as being a quiet and unpleasant land of levelled brown glass.

The Vicar has got a lovely arse, though.

[tango15]

The thing which I found most amusing and perhaps completely apposite was the wording

She was also responsible for Tomahawk cruise missiles, embarking special forces at sea and covert insertions.

[TheGreenGoblin]

One would like to think that the crew on these nuclear boats are picked for their intelligence!

Errr. Did you think that one through?

They are picked to exclusively include those who don't think through the consequences of their final and most catastrophic actions.

Intelligence doesn't necessarily need to encompass morality... (in this case quite clearly not the latter)...

[Undried Plum]

Intelligence and Morality ought to be co-joined, else Humanity is ****.

[TheGreenGoblin]

Intelligence and Morality ought to be co-joined, else Humanity is ****.

I agree but, sadly, it is psychopaths and sociopaths all the way down, unfortunately!

[ian16th]

Ian, the thing about barristers is not to ask any question to which you don't know the answer.

That is a quote from Rumpole/John Mortimer!

[Undried Plum]

I agree but, sadly, it is psychopaths and sociopaths all the way down, unfortunately!

Not even a lower ground floor for hippos and crocs to be seen by Germans, paris pasus, at dinnertime?

How low can one go. A question I've asked oneself a time or two before.

Buggah!

There goes my putative for a hope for an invitation to dinner Chez Boteti-sur-Sable-sans-Mer-by-the-way.

I'da brung a bottlae wine and everyfink.


Now, I've got to eat what in Scotland and Norway is interchangeably called "meat" for dinner.

Sumbdyaes got to do it. It might as well be me.

Red deer.

Braise the Lord.

[Pontius Navigator]

Ian, definitely Mortimer but no doubt not original. In the book I mentioned, otherwise mediocre, the defense manoeuvred the questions such that the prosecution had to ask a question. Not to do so would have left doubt, to ask risked proving the defense case, but it was the only way left to avoid defeat. Of course in the novel it was checkmate.

[OFSO]

Not only a rule for barristers. Also for married men.

[G-CPTN]

The PSU for my laptop computer 'fused' due to overheating three days ago - I needed to preserve the remaining juice to monitor for urgent/important email messages so I have been 'offline' until this morning 10:30, and it has taken me until just now (20:20) to catch up with my usual forum scuttlebutt.

[Undried Plum]

Am attending to what may turn out to be an allnighter of a conference call with some people in a SouthEastAsian place which was once coveted by The Empire.

There's yet another Survey which has been cocked up by people who don't understand the amphidromic nature of tides. They need help from someone with grey hair.

The damnable thing about it is that I must stay off The Macallan because even the slightest slurring of speech is amplified by microphones. I shall add a premium to my already hefty fee for that reason.

Through the window, I'm looking at a Christmassy scene. Yesterday we had well over a foot of snow on top of the four inches that I woke up to. On my evening patrol I measured the level depth to be 16". That was in an area which was unaffected by drifting. Some of the drifts are a bit Canadian or Norwegian, up the to the rafters of some of the outbuildings. A proppa winter.

Nil wind, so sucking power from the Grid. Don't like doing that. Nice and warm, though. I likes that.

Bubbly bits of hot chocolate foam are nice to suck on from my overlong moustache. Glad it's not a video conference call. I very very badly need a haircut.

Upp here we go, I'm on. Blethers wi' y'all later.

[Ex-Ascot]

Morning folks. Supposed to be raining but quite bright. Had a classic example of NR behaviour and mentality this morning. Night security is supposed to do hourly rounds then write down the exact time started. We knew that he had done 20.00 and 21.00. Mrs Ex-Ascot was awake at 22.00 and didn't see him go past the window, same with me at 01.00 and 05.00. Checked the recording (from bed), no action from 21.00 to 05.23. I went out to speak to him at 06.00. First thing he said was that he had problems with his mobile and the alarm was failing. I was prepared to let him off with 'these things happen, get it fixed'. He had logged every hour on the hour. I said so these times are wrong, my phone is broken, and so it went on he would not admit that he was lying. So we went and watched the recording, on the main system, of him sleeping from 21.00 to 05.20. He still would not admit that the log was fiction. In the end I said you have lied to me and you will not get paid. 'I was not lying to you boss it was my phone that was lying'.

[TheGreenGoblin]

In the end I said you have lied to me and you will not get paid. 'I was not lying to you boss it was my phone that was lying'.

"It ees not lost, it ees broken..."



Why don't you just buy three boerboels, called Savage, Spikes and Razor Wire and just fire Mr Sleepy Head?

[Undried Plum]

Morning folks. Supposed to be raining but quite bright. Had a classic example of NR behaviour and mentality this morning. Night security is supposed to do hourly rounds then write down the exact time started. We knew that he had done 20.00 and 21.00. Mrs Ex-Ascot was awake at 22.00 and didn't see him go past the window, same with me at 01.00 and 05.00. Checked the recording (from bed), no action from 21.00 to 05.23. I went out to speak to him at 06.00. First thing he said was that he had problems with his mobile and the alarm was failing. I was prepared to let him off with 'these things happen, get it fixed'. He had logged every hour on the hour. I said so these times are wrong, my phone is broken, and so it went on he would not admit that he was lying. So we went and watched the recording, on the main system, of him sleeping from 21.00 to 05.20. He still would not admit that the log was fiction. In the end I said you have lied to me and you will not get paid. 'I was not lying to you boss it was my phone that was lying'.

Promote him, immediately, to the upper echelons of the SNP!

[TheGreenGoblin]

Minus 4 degrees Celsius in the shed. Car windscreen wash frozen, but the jalopy started up without whinging.

Skies clear at the moment... but stratus on the horizon.

EGSS 100458Z 1006/1112 04009KT 9999 SCT035 TEMPO 1006/1018 5000 -SHSN PROB30 TEMPO 1006/1016 2000 SHSN BKN007 PROB30 TEMPO 1103/1109 5000 -SHSN BKN008

[handsfree]

Promote him, immediately, to the upper echelons of the SNP!

Can't do that, he'd outshine the lot of them. Apart from the number of lies of course.

-3°C wind chill -7°C. It's been snowing overnight leaving about 3 inches of snow on the ground.
Sunny spells with snow showers forecast. Winds from the NE 15 kts gusting 25.

Off to the tooth mangler this morning - weather and roads permitting.

[Undried Plum]

OAT -7°C. Snow showers.

Don't want Whisky for breakfast. Want snuggles.

[Ex-Ascot]

Re. Night security chap, just been back for some money off his book to go into town for a new phone! Think that the wife may have been involved in the decision.

GG, problem with dogs is that they crap all over the place, dig up the garden, when they bark you do not know if it an intruder or a hippo and they can be poisoned. Also they need exercise and there is no where to walk them here.

[TheGreenGoblin]

Talking of Hippo's...

They are a colony of the planet’s deadliest land mammals - and they owe their existence to one of humanity’s most notorious criminals. Now scientists have warned Pablo Escobar’s hippopotami must be executed to stop them causing death and destruction in the heart of Colombia.

Escobar, once one of the world’s most prolific drug traffickers, collected a range of illegally imported animals at his luxurious palace in the Colombian mountains during his life.

However while he and his criminal empire have both passed away, the legacy of his personal zoo lives on - with hippos that he acquired from a US zoo left to flourish in the tropical countryside and wetlands around his former base.

And while the Colombian government has attempted to control the reproduction of the animals, the number of hippos in the wilds around Puerto Triunfo has continued to increase from 35 to as many as 80 in the last eight years.

Scientists behind a study on the spread of the animals now say the choice is between culling the ancestors of the drug kingpin’s semi-aquatic specimens - or see numbers reach around 1,500 over the next 14 years, threatening biodiversity and risking citizen safety.

While posing a risk both to both people and animal populations in the are, the animals have been welcomed by locals due to the tourist money they bring to the region.

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However experts say government efforts must go further if they are to stop the beasts destroying animal species and harming local populations.

The study assessing the hippo population in the region began last year after one of the animals chased and severely injured a poor farmer.

Ms Castelblanco-Martinez, the lead author on the paper published last month, added: “Everyone asks, ‘Why is this happening?’ Well, imagine a town of 50 people and you perform a vasectomy on one man and in two years on another man, obviously, that is not going to control the reproduction of the entire population,”

The researcher warned the surging number of hippos in the region could displace native populations like Antillean manatees - while another study last year from the University of California, San Diego, found the hippos are changing the quality of the water in which they spend much of their time and defecate.

While many of the animals kept by Escobar were relocated after his death in a shootout in 1993, the hippopotami were abandoned at his estate due to the financial and logistical challenge of moving them.

After his death in a shootout with authorities in 1993, most of the exotic animals were relocated or died. But the hippos were abandoned at the estate due to the cost and logistical issues associated with transporting 3-ton animals and the violence that plagued the area at the time.

Being left to their own devices allowed the species to thrive in the region between Medellin and Colombia’s capital, Bogota.

However their popularity has so-far led to significant pushback against efforts to reduce their population through culling efforts.

“The community keeps an eye on us to make sure that we are actually sterilising (the hippos) and not doing anything else,” said Gina Serna-Trujillo, a veterinarian who has conducted some of the sterilisations. “They love them.”

Ms Castelblanco-Martinez added: “We have other invasive species in Colombia that have undergone normal protocols, and no one ever makes a fuss because they are fishing lionfish,” she said referring to a fish native to the Indo-Pacific that is now an invasive species in the Atlantic Ocean.

“You can’t even talk about (culling hippos) because the rejection is staggering. … I am being called a murderer.”

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/worl ... 99945.html

[OFSO]

Mrs OFSO has consumed for breakfast a large bowl of porridge, topped off with cream and a measure of Armagnac, because the house is cold (which it is).

Would anyone countenance having a small box in the living room, containing a demon, which ranted and raved hysterically through a viewing grill three days a week? Thought not. So why do we have Piers Morgan on GMB.....