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Pontius Navigator wrote: ↑

Sun Jul 11, 2021 7:01 am

England fans after the semi final had a practice standing on top of a London bus. Not being Indian they were clearly not practiced in such things. I hope tonight they don't fall off or throw themselves under said bus.

Of course England may miss the bus completely but I doubt it!

Back in 2000 a teenager in Texas tried to play an even more dangerous version of Russian Roulette. Instead of putting one bullet in a revolver and pulling the trigger, giving him a one-in-six chance of dying, he put the bullet in a semi-automatic pistol (where the bullets are instantly moved into the gun’s chamber), rising those odds to exactly 100 per cent.

ExA, well 99% perhaps in the event of a misfire and somewhat better odds if it was 9mm made in Pakistan.

Telegraph

Several people, said to be taking selfies near a historical fort in northern India, were among nearly 80 killed by lightning strikes...... a dozen people who were watching the storm cross Jaipur city from towers near the 12th-century Amer Fort late on Sunday.

Back in 2000 a teenager in Texas tried to play an even more dangerous version of Russian Roulette. Instead of putting one bullet in a revolver and pulling the trigger, giving him a one-in-six chance of dying, he put the bullet in a semi-automatic pistol (where the bullets are instantly moved into the gun’s chamber), rising those odds to exactly 100 per cent.

I am at a total loss to decide just which is the saddest part; (a) That someone would be stupid enough to play Russian Roulette in the first place, or
(b) That someone would be so (expletive deleted) stupid to not know how a semi-auto works!

There is, of course, the option that it was deliberate...ie suicide. However, I am cynical enough by now to accept that some people are so blitheringly stupid that it is amazing that they actually remember to keep breathing!

PtP, amazing that he was able to hit his brain.

Which leads nicely to a football joke and David Beckham in his younger days. He went to the barbers and as he sat in the chair the barber asked him to remove his headphones.

He did, but immediately dropped down dead. Astonished, the barber picked up the headphones to find what he had been listening to:

"breathe in, breathe out, breathe in..."

Pontius Navigator; I last heard that one as a Blonde joke!

Which, I might add, used to mildy annoy a former Girlfriend who was a blonde.
After all, she did have a degree in Mathematics!

This guy is definitely showing potential

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/articl ... l#comments

He had the flare the wrong way round, though.

If he's going to Qatar next year then I think he might find the locals a bit less accommodating of his drunken antics.

Is it not a requirement of the Darwin challenge that the participant is in possession of an adequate quantity of brain to be categorised as a human being as opposed to being identifiable only as a squirming lump of useless ectoplasm??

No taste or refinement whatsoever, apalling vulgarity. Probably never even heard of The Dance of the Flaming Arseholes, which when performed properly is a thing of grace and beauty, especially with the added refinement of leaping from table to table in a German Kneipe. Well, almost.

OFSO wrote: ↑

Fri Jul 16, 2021 6:05 am

No taste or refinement whatsoever, apalling vulgarity. Probably never even heard of The Dance of the Flaming Arseholes, which when performed properly is a thing of grace and beauty, especially with the added refinement of leaping from table to table in a German Kneipe. Well, almost.

Sorry to have missed one of your finest performances, OFSO.

One of our contract staff, actually in Die Kleines Parliament, Darmstadt. Fell off the fourth table and broke his ankle. Ermtraud the waitress - plump with one of those white off-the-shoulder blouses beloved of buxom German waitresses - came out from the bar with three litres of Pilsner in each hand, saw what was going on, and promptly fainted, large bosums quivering uncontrollably as she fell on her back, beer flying everywhere. An awesome spectacle. Revived with a schnapps or two and sent home. Participants in the DOTFA were banned for life. If I remember correctly, the guy doing the Dance was hit by a car crossing the road some months later and died. He had, however, Made his Mark and entered the Hall of Fame with his Arse of Flame.

Ermtraud the waitress - plump with one of those white off-the-shoulder blouses beloved of buxom German waitresses -

Ach so! The type of which Slasher would approve, ja?

A definite candidate here:

A Bitcoin miner has died after his computer exploded during an attempt to increase its power and allow him to mine more Bitcoins, in what is believed to be the cryptocurrency industry’s first fatality.

The death of Danai Makmek, 26, in Thailand is the latest in a string of industrial accidents caused by unregulated Bitcoin mining.

Mr Makmek was reported to have been distraught after his sprawling banks of computers developed problems with their hard drives. He attempted to repair them, causing a blast that electrocuted him.

I have never ever Bungee jumped....as a result of this I have never ever put myself in harms way.....this message was delivered to you by the anti Darwin Award Brigade....

You can thanks us 40 years from now...

I fear, EA, it is too late for you to qualify for the award anyway.

Good to know BOAC, 'cos surely I went close a few times in my yoof!