The New Football Thread

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ricardian
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1921 Post by ricardian » Fri Jun 18, 2021 4:55 pm

Kane goes into the English changing room to find all his team mates looking a bit glum.
"What's up?" he asks.
"Well, we're having trouble getting motivated for this game. We know it's important but it's only Scotland. They're shite and we can't be bothered".
Kane looks at them and says "Well, I reckon I can beat these by myself, you lads go down the pub."
So Kane goes out to play Scotland by himself and the rest of the English team go off for a few pints. After a few jars they wonder how the game is going, so they get the landlord to put the teletext on. A big cheer goes up as the screen reads "England 1 - Scotland 0 (Kane 10minutes)". He is beating Scotland all by himself!
Anyway, a few more pints later and the game is forgotten until someone remembers "It must be full time now, let's see how he got on". They put the teletext on.
"Result from the Stadium "England 1 (Kane 10 minutes) - Scotland 1"(Angus McShagnasty 89 minutes)".
They can't believe it, he has single handedly got a draw against Scotland!!
They rush back to the Stadium to congratulate him. They find him in the dressing room, still in his gear, sat with his head in his hands. He refuses to look at them.
"I've let you down, I've let you down."
"Don't be daft, you got a draw against Scotland , all by yourself. And they only scored at the very very end"
"No, No, I have, I've let you down - I got sent off after 12 minutes"
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1922 Post by Woody » Fri Jun 18, 2021 8:50 pm

Well that was dull X_X
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1923 Post by tango15 » Fri Jun 18, 2021 9:32 pm

Woody wrote:
Fri Jun 18, 2021 8:50 pm
Well that was dull X_X
Norrarf! As was the commentary.

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1924 Post by ian16th » Mon Jun 21, 2021 1:14 pm

Just to mention the important domestic promotion.

Hartlepool Utd. have been promoted back to the Football League!

Cloughie would be happy.

H'Angus will be around the grounds next season.
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1925 Post by tango15 » Mon Jun 21, 2021 1:21 pm

ian16th wrote:
Mon Jun 21, 2021 1:14 pm
Just to mention the important domestic promotion.

Hartlepool Utd. have been promoted back to the Football League!

Cloughie would be happy.

H'Angus will be around the grounds next season.
Jeff Stelling off Sky Sports will be pleased!

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1926 Post by Woody » Tue Jun 22, 2021 8:06 am

First the UNESCO fiasco over Bramley-Moore dock and this ongoing saga, EFC the gift that keeps on giving :))

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/footb ... nager.html
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1927 Post by Woody » Tue Jun 22, 2021 9:28 pm

He gets paid for this insightful view :((
Former England forward Ian Wright speaking on ITV: “The tests are still to come but I am still feeling quite positive about what we are capable of doing.

"We don’t know what our best attack is yet but there is still stuff to look forward to.”
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1928 Post by Woody » Thu Jun 24, 2021 8:02 am

Looks like Ian16th has been commenting on the BBC website about England v Germany next week :D
Southgate will need to up his game plan if he has one, as watching this England side is just like watching the Boro when he was in charge there, “boring”
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1929 Post by ian16th » Thu Jun 24, 2021 8:13 am

Woody wrote:
Thu Jun 24, 2021 8:02 am
Looks like Ian16th has been commenting on the BBC website about England v Germany next week :D
Southgate will need to up his game plan if he has one, as watching this England side is just like watching the Boro when he was in charge there, “boring”
I prefer to remember this era:

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1930 Post by Woody » Thu Jun 24, 2021 8:43 am

I was at this match :D

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1931 Post by llondel » Thu Jun 24, 2021 4:18 pm

Wee Krankie has demanded a re-run of the Scotland-Croatia game because it didn't give her the result she wanted.

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1932 Post by Ibbie » Thu Jun 24, 2021 4:23 pm

Away goals rule for drawn games in European competitions abolished.

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1933 Post by Ibbie » Tue Jun 29, 2021 3:31 pm

Southgate has selected a team to lose against Germany.

What an utter plonker!

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1934 Post by Woody » Tue Jun 29, 2021 4:58 pm

Jermaine Jenas X( , I know that the BBC have got to make cutbacks, but **** hell he’s useless.
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Re: The New Football Thread

#1935 Post by Karearea » Tue Jun 29, 2021 6:42 pm

Rather pleased I got up at 4am to listen to that game :YMAPPLAUSE:

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1936 Post by Opsboi » Tue Jun 29, 2021 6:58 pm

Karearea wrote:
Tue Jun 29, 2021 6:42 pm
Rather pleased I got up at 4am to listen to that game :YMAPPLAUSE:
Better than watching it, believe me

A rugby team that inaccurate would get minced every time

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1937 Post by Boac » Tue Jun 29, 2021 7:10 pm

Southgate has selected a team to lose against Germany.
What went wrong?

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1938 Post by Opsboi » Tue Jun 29, 2021 7:14 pm

Boac wrote:
Tue Jun 29, 2021 7:10 pm
Southgate has selected a team to lose against Germany.
What went wrong?
Low selected a team to lose against Ingerlund

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1939 Post by Boac » Tue Jun 29, 2021 7:21 pm

Ah! Thanks for explaining it - I don't really follow the 'beautiful game', but I did have a drink or 3 to celebrate the 55 year gap (OK - any excuse.... :)) ). Both my sons were not even a twinkle in my eye then and I was a JP student.

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Re: The New Football Thread

#1940 Post by ribrash » Tue Jun 29, 2021 7:44 pm

These fairies need to sit down and watch the Tour de France.Absolute carnage on the road yesterday.Looked like an explosion in an abatoir.Despite all of that only 1 rider didn't turn up today.....broken collarbone stopped play.To top it all Mark Cavendish took his 31st stage win.

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