Friday Jokes

[llondel]

viagrabus.jpg (66.69 KiB) Viewed 853 times

[ribrash]

Its said that some Alligators can grow up to 15 feet.....
But most only have 4.

[ricardian]

One for Ex-Ascot:

[Ex-Ascot]

One for Ex-Ascot:

Can't see anything wrong with that. They gave me one of those things. On TACEVAL when there was a gas attack you were supposed to sit in the main corridor of the Sqn wearing it pretending that it was an air raid shelter. I went into my office, locked the door and got some work done. I used to have a mess garage for my car when I was down the route. If caught outside I would drive my car into there, close the door and listen to the radio. I was put on gardening leave for my last TACEVAL apparently I was a bad influence on the junior officers. One didn't care

[ricardian]

[Alisoncc]

What ever happened to ALC aka Rusty Twotter. His avatar showed him wearing a gas mask ?

Alison

[ricardian]

[ricardian]

Celebrating International Women's Day

[Ex-Ascot]

What ever happened to ALC aka Rusty Twotter. His avatar showed him wearing a gas mask ?

Alison

He is alive and well flying his Twotters around here.

[ricardian]

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

We are in the presence of comic genius.
Keep it up mate!

[ricardian]

I don't think that they will be using this photograph in their advertising material

[ricardian]

[FD2]

[ribrash]

[Pontius Navigator]

Ribrash, like when Mrs PN googled "Hair styles for mature ladies". I haven't dared look.

[Ex-Ascot]

An old one but still funny.

The only seat available on the train was directly adjacent to a well dressed middle aged French woman and the seat was being used by her dog. The weary traveler asked, "Ma'am, please move your dog. I need that seat." The French woman looked down her nose at the American, sniffed and said, You Americans. You are such a rude class of people. Can't you see my little FiFi is using that seat?" The American walked away, determined to find a place to rest, but after another trip down to the end of the train, found himself again facing the woman with the dog. Again he asked, "Please, lady. May I sit there?". I'm very tired." The French woman wrinkled her nose and snorted "You Americans! Not only are you rude, you are also arrogant....Imagine!" The American didn't say anything else. Hhe leaned over, picked up the dog, tossed it out the window of the train and sat down in the empty seat. The woman shrieked and railed, and demanded that someone defend her honor and chastise the American. An English man sitting across the aisle spoke up indignantly "You know, sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand. You drive your autos on the wrong side of the road. And now, Sir, you've thrown the wrong bitch out the window."

[ricardian]

[ricardian]

Sex in the Dark
There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figured she would break him out of this crazy habits so one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights.
She looked down... and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated pleasure device... a vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic.
"You impotent pig!" She screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You'd better explain yourself!"
The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: "I'll explain the toy, you explain the kids."

[Pontius Navigator]

Ricardian, bit close the the truth, remember the lesbian last year also insisted on lights out and used a prosthetic.