Friday Jokes

[Woody]

https://fb.watch/itTxrLVpMZ/

[Woody]

[Pontius Navigator]

https://fb.watch/itTxrLVpMZ/

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[Woody]

It’s an old Jethro video about the French, I’ll try and find another link for you.

[4mastacker]

Thanks for that link. Jethro's "Wrong Diagnosis" is brilliant. Mrs 4ma couldn't work out why I couldn't stop laughing until she watched it - then she couldn't stop.

[Hydromet]

Screenshot 2023-02-05 at 11.57.17 am.png (248.06 KiB) Viewed 1037 times

[ricardian]

My friend bought a Humpty Dumpty toy from Aldi. It came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

Lemme guess. The Humpty broke after two months, but when you took it back to Aldi, the assistant said "They're supposed to do that".

[llondel]

My friend bought a Humpty Dumpty toy from Aldi. It came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.

That was more than a Lidl bad.

[Opsboi]

My friend bought a Humpty Dumpty toy from Aldi. It came with Aldi King's horses and Aldi King's men.

That was more than a Lidl bad.

It Asda be said

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

Yet More-reasons for supermarkets not selling toys.

[ricardian]

I, too, was once a man trapped in a woman's body. Then I was born.

[ricardian]

The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon "Quickie" with their 8 -year old son in the flat, was to send him out on the balcony with a Mars Bar and tell him to report on all the street activities. Their 8-year old began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation;
'There's a car being towed from the car park,' he shouted.
'An ambulance just drove past'
'Looks like the Anderson 's have visitors,' he called out.
'Matt's riding a new bike!'
'Looks like the Sanders are moving!'
'Jason is on his skateboard!
After a few moments he announced, 'The Coopers are having a shag!'
Startled , his mum and dad shot up in bed! Dad cautiously called out, 'How do you know that?'
'Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a Mars Bar.'

[Woody]

[ricardian]

My friend has just told me that her son got sent home from college yesterday. He was suspended for running around the girls toilets waving his willy around! Idiotic, yes, but it seems he had done it for a bet. Suspension seemed to be a bit harsh, so she rang the headmaster to explain that it was just a bit of tomfoolery gone too far. However, he was having none of it and has stuck by the suspension. Getting a bit peeved, she asked the head if he would rather have him thieving and smashing the school up like others I could mention.
"No", the head replied, "I would rather have him teaching the year 5 geography class that he is employed to do."

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

Many people struggle with the mathematics of propositional logic, but this is usually due to the lack of suitable examples to which the student can relate.

Take the Conclusion: Neither of this man's parents spoke English
The premises and logical deductions which led to this conclusion are immediately made apparent by a single photograph

dr-whet-faartz.jpg (174.94 KiB) Viewed 610 times

[Ex-Ascot]

Dentist.

[Ex-Ascot]

Baby Jesus.

[Pinky the pilot]

Fox3; Misnaming in one way or another is not neccessarily limited to foreign names.

An aquaintance of mine was named Vivian. In the RAAF, his nickname was 'Jack.'

'What, Vivian James *******' I asked?

'No, Vivian Desmond *******' he replied.

[ricardian]

An ingenious advert