The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Bugger! Just answered the front door to find two Jehovah Witnesses. Didn’t used to get them at our previous abode.
- TheGreenGoblin
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Tell them that you are Catholic, they hate and abhor Catholics even more than they do Jews!
A good, even practicing Anglican, doesn't figure in their crap...
Though you remain
Convinced
"To be alive
You must have somewhere
To go
Your destination remains
Elusive."
Convinced
"To be alive
You must have somewhere
To go
Your destination remains
Elusive."
Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
I was raised in a JW family Sise. Sh!t of a life for a kid - no fun, no birthday parties (nor invites), no Xmas trees, no presents, nothin’. Picked on at school - and In our already tough crappy suburb yet another reason to have to learn to fight like a merciless gutter rat. They threw me out when I was 17 after I told ‘em they’re all a bunch of fcuking morons.
Mum mellowed a couple of years beforehand. She was originally a Baptist. After I was booted out of the enclave I was disowned by my old man and sister. They wanted to throw me out of the house but mum stood up to ‘em.
JWs used to pick early Sunday mornings for their recruitment propaganda drive in an attempt to intercept Protestants before they went to church to persuade them to come over to the Dark Side. Once captured they would slowly brainwash their (stoopid) victims into what is essentially isolationism.
If JWs come a knockin’ then confront the buggers with a double barreled shotgun. Blow ‘em all to Hell where they belong.
- TheGreenGoblin
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Damn it man! A good mom, makes for a good man!
With respect.
Though you remain
Convinced
"To be alive
You must have somewhere
To go
Your destination remains
Elusive."
Convinced
"To be alive
You must have somewhere
To go
Your destination remains
Elusive."
Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Amazing how they manage to split families....the love and forgiveness of God and all that
Well done for surviving it Slasher.
Well done for surviving it Slasher.
- Ex-Ascot
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Morning folks. It is supposed to raining. It is not but there has been a rumble.
Ricardian:
All CCTV cameras working now except the one in the library, don't know why not. We can sit on the veranda and see where our staff are and if they are working.
All the pelicans are still here. Wish I had my camera the thieving black bastards.
Ricardian:
We use Racumin which is an anticoagulant. It kills the vermin over a period of time but anything that eats it when dead is not poisoned.I never use poison as I'd hate for an owl to eat a poisoned mouse and thus succumb.
All CCTV cameras working now except the one in the library, don't know why not. We can sit on the veranda and see where our staff are and if they are working.
All the pelicans are still here. Wish I had my camera the thieving black bastards.
'Yes, Madam, I am drunk, but in the morning I shall be sober and you will still be ugly.' Sir Winston Churchill.
- OFSO
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
A force nine blowing up here. Hundreds spent the night sleeping in their cars and trucks on the elevated motorway and lower main road into France which is blocked by separatistas. We were invited to a gala evening in France on Friday next, although forecasts of snow on the pass were already making it look uncertain.
- Rwy in Sight
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- Ibbie
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Morning folks.
Another substandard performance in last nights quiz.
Similar weather to yesterday, clear blue sky but coldfor here 14c.
As for JW calling, as soon as I tell them I'm a humanist they clear off, Only one has dared to ask me what a humanist is.
Another substandard performance in last nights quiz.
Similar weather to yesterday, clear blue sky but coldfor here 14c.
As for JW calling, as soon as I tell them I'm a humanist they clear off, Only one has dared to ask me what a humanist is.
- Woody
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Just wait until the Mormons find you
When all else fails, read the instructions.
- Smeagol
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Can't remember having either group call at our, rather rural and out of the way, location, however both would be greeted by a pleasant, "No thank you" and if this did not have the desired effect would be followed by the less polite, "F*ck off!"
We hates Bagginses!
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Knock knock
Who's there?
JW
Oh do come in, sit down, would you like tea and biscuits? What would you like to talk about?
Don't know, we've never got this far before.
Hat, coat, scarf, find me own way out
Who's there?
JW
Oh do come in, sit down, would you like tea and biscuits? What would you like to talk about?
Don't know, we've never got this far before.
Hat, coat, scarf, find me own way out
- Ex-Ascot
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
No JWs knocking on our door here, they can't find us. My father used to engage them in conversation (on the door step) he found it enormous fun disproving their beliefs and quoting the bible to prove it.
Just been up to the safari camp. Met a chap who lives in Norway very close to the most northern point in Europe. When he gets back there he will not see the sun again until February. Already one metre of snow.
Another dead cow stuck in mud in front. Butchered and removed.
Just been up to the safari camp. Met a chap who lives in Norway very close to the most northern point in Europe. When he gets back there he will not see the sun again until February. Already one metre of snow.
Another dead cow stuck in mud in front. Butchered and removed.
'Yes, Madam, I am drunk, but in the morning I shall be sober and you will still be ugly.' Sir Winston Churchill.
- Mrs Ex-Ascot
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
In my secondary school class we had JW twins who were great fun. They made it quite clear that they and their older brother were unhappy. We all made a point of giving them birthday and Christmas cards and presents. On one occasion their father made the mistake of coming to our house to sell his dysfunctional religion; I slammed the front door hard onto his ankle. He screamed and limped away. The next day at school the twins were gleefully telling everyone about their damaged father and made it quite clear that they knew it was me and thought it was very funny too.
Needless to say as soon as they hit the age of eighteen they left the JW's and couldn't give a stuff about being disowned by their parents. Good for them!
Needless to say as soon as they hit the age of eighteen they left the JW's and couldn't give a stuff about being disowned by their parents. Good for them!
RAF 32 Sqn B Flt ; Twin Squirrels.
- ian16th
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
J'Ws?
Never had trouble with them.
I just tell them that I'm not superstitious.
Never had trouble with them.
I just tell them that I'm not superstitious.
Cynicism improves with age
- OFSO
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Tree surgeons arrived as scheduled. Lead man is a Czecho. Done my trees for years. Good man.
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
A Catholic friend told me to tell the Joes that i was a devout Catholic and they would cross me off their list.It seemed to have worked because they hardly ever knock and if they do it is just to give me a leaflet and ask me to read it if i have time, no conversation.
- Rwy in Sight
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
I spend a very short (of about 40 minutes) packed flight out of my home airport with a lady (neither Slasher or me would have found attractive) explaining me about JW. Not an unpleasant way actually. Also every now and then I stopped by their stand where they give away their leaflets. I let those people talk if I have time, they tick the box they talked to someone and we go ahead with our lives.
Mrs Ex-Ascot, nice way to support the young believers.
OFSO, good for your tree surgeons. I hope you have someone on the ground to rapidly pick up the branches.
Mrs Ex-Ascot, nice way to support the young believers.
OFSO, good for your tree surgeons. I hope you have someone on the ground to rapidly pick up the branches.
Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
Supposedly the way to get the religious salesmen (and women) to desist is to ask them to come back in a couple of days when they can meet the whole coven. Witchcraft, or the suggestion of it, is apparently something they avoid and they never come back.
- OFSO
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Re: The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread IV
They do. Carry all green debris including logs up the garden steps to the street above. Then use a blower on the steps. The ground has a slope of 40° so exhausting job. The town council will pick up green debris cut by the home owner and not by professionals, who have to pay for professional collection. I.e. I have to pay. To circumvent this I restacked the pile further down the street, with large logs hidden underneath small oliander and olive twigs which look suitably cuttable by someone of my enfeebled years. Hopefully once Senyor Council Pickup Man starts on the pile with his grab, like the man in the Spittoon Joke, he won't be able to stop.