Rant of the Day v2.

[Wodrick]

Ditto SM

[ian16th]

When she knows I haven't got my hearing aids in, she starts a conversation at hi volume and fades after 4 words!

[Magnus]

Ian16th, are you complaining or boasting?

[Pontius Navigator]

When my MiL visits I always put my hearing aids in.

I just leave out the batteries.

[ian16th]

When my MiL visits I always put my hearing aids in.

I just leave out the batteries.

I keep telling people, a hearing aid with a dud battery, is just an expensive ear plug!

[Slasher]

When my MiL visits I always put my hearing aids in.

I just leave out the batteries.

Reminds me of Mrs Richards' stay at Flowery Twats.

[Capetonian]

Did anyone else here know that glass conducts electricity?
My wife knows that you can get an electric shock from touching the glass part of a lighting globe.

[Slasher]

Yep. Lecky is hot too!

[Pontius Navigator]

Yeah, the Victorians were not on lucky globes too.

[llondel]

Molten glass definitely conducts electricity. So does firebrick if you make it hot enough, such as in a kiln. Fired up a new kiln once and it tripped the house RCD as it got so somewhere around 1000C. Did some tests with an ammeter in the earth lead and eventually resorted to taking the earth off of it as it was shut in the garage on its own while firing.

[Capetonian]

i'm waiting for a flight. They've made about 8 last and final announcements for missing passengers for one departure.
Take bags off, go without them fine the bastards and then ban them.

[Rwy in Sight]

However you need to fine the agent who puts "final call" on the departure board while the last few passengers step out from the incoming flight.

[Pontius Navigator]

However you need to fine the agent who puts "final call" on the departure board while the last few passengers step out from the incoming flight.

Same as 'look sharp you lot . . . '

Doing a transfer at AMS, we arrived 3 hours late (fog) and our connection, also delayed, was 'boarding'. Only thing is it was not at the originally briefed gate but much further away.

We got a shift on and arrived at the gate the join a few other puzzled pax. No staff present, doors closed and no aircraft in the stand. Presently aircraft and staff arrived, we boarded and at arrival collected our baggage as normal.

[OFSO]

France.

[Capetonian]

I'm trying to find a company that can manufacturer the latest device on which I've taken a patent.

It's known as the SFG or stinking fart generator. The idea is that it will do exactly as it says on demand, when somebody stands behind me in a queue beathing down my neck. Unfortunately I'm not physically capable of producing really foul smelling farts on demand.

[llondel]

i'm waiting for a flight. They've made about 8 last and final announcements for missing passengers for one departure.
Take bags off, go without them fine the bastards and then ban them.

Was waiting for a flight the other day, arrived as the previous one was at the tail end of boarding. Several final calls and then someone turns up. The gate agent told him he was living on the edge. I think he made the flight but only just.

We were in that situation once but it was because our incoming (international) flight was delayed and they closed the doors right behind us. Must be some sort of record to clear US customs and security check and get to a gate at the arse end of the terminal building in 35 minutes. It was CVG, where all incoming international passengers had to do security because of how the place was arranged which meant they had to pass through the rest of the airport to get groundside. No idea whether it has been changed because I've never been back.

[Pontius Navigator]

Cape, not a problem. Always available and since my cancer op, much more frequent. Apparently I should have changed my eating habits but I forgot what they said.

[OFSO]

You can buy Stinking Fart Gas in German Joke Shops. (Yes, such emporiums do exist,). I bought some for my odious stepson, years ago, and he was nearly expelled from his school for doing what I explicitly told him not to do.

[Magnus]

Used to travel with a colleague who would wait until called by name before ordering his last pint of Guinness at LHR. Selfish git.

[Pontius Navigator]

You can buy Stinking Fart Gas in German Joke Shops. (Yes, such emporiums do exist,). I bought some for my odious stepson, years ago, and he was nearly expelled from his school for doing what I explicitly told him not to do.

Well what did you expect?

Remember the little glass stink bombs?
Itching powder.
Black centred soap.
A chemical, I forget which one, that exploded when you trod on it.