Pilots and Divorce

[CharlieOneSix]

I can stop conversation at a party by saying I have had AIDS....and a few seconds later I explain by saying like many pilots I have suffered from Aviation Induced Divorce Syndrome caused by unsocial hours, last minute roster changes, redundancy, enforced changes of base etc. etc.. It therefore didn't surprise me too much today to open the latest copy of BALPA's magazine, The Log, to see large advertisements on 4 of its 58 pages on behalf of Divorce Lawyers.

On the basis that these companies wouldn't advertise where there wasn't a good return, and accepting I may be accused of being simplistic, I think it's a sad indicator of the stresses of an aviation career.

[G-CPTN]

When I was considering (in the 1960s) an aviation career as a pilot, I became aware of the predisposition for broken marriages (and relationships) - so nothing is new.

[Sisemen]

I’m convinced it’s Avtur or Avgas contamination that does it. I’m on No 3!

[CharlieOneSix]

I'm on No.4 and after 23 years I think the present Mrs C16 is a keeper. Some years ago two other helicopter pilots and myself, all of a similar age, were chatting and we came to the horrific realisation that we had a total of 10 marriages between us........

[Boac]

(Still on my first!) The advice I was given as a young occifer was to introduce her as 'My first wife'. Sets the scene nicely I feel

[Capetonian]

A pilot friend of mine introduces his wife as 'my ex-fiancée' ......... and then adds 'who is now my wife for life.'

[Boac]

Fool! Although he may be expecting to die young? Ah, I'm just an old romantic at heart......

[Cacophonix]

Apparently actuaries, who I can vouch, are amongst the most boring people on God's earth, have one of the lowest divorce rates in the so-called professions in the UK and in the studies in the USA as well. It is no coincidence I think given that they are also amongst the highest paid of the professions. Money is a great solidifier and is, perhaps, uber alles in calming the turbid waters between many married partners or is it just perhaps that actuaries, and their partners, are simply too unimaginative to consider extra nuptial shenanigans and the like?

Airline pilots come nowhere near having the highest divorce rates noted in most studies of divorce by profession, despite the many pressures that connubial bliss faces in the airline pilot cohort.

Flight attendants fare worse than pilots on the divorce scale and this can again be related to their relatively low salaries while sharing many of the marital risks that pilots face.

I have tried to find statistics for helicopter pilots, specifically, but as usual this group of renegades seems to avoid classification.

@Boac

Ah, I'm just an old romantic at heart......

Or is it that the girlies know that old Lightning pilots never strike the same heart twice (presumably because they had run out of fuel or their aircraft had caught fire) and therefore hang onto their men. I say this making the assumption that there were never any female RAF Lightning pilots?

Caco

[Boac]

Female Lightning pilots - hrrrmph! Gad, Sir - pistols at dawn on the common!

[Cacophonix]

Female Lightning pilots - hrrrmph! Gad, Sir - pistols at dawn on the common!

I know I went too far there, even by my parlous standards Boac. Pass me the mess Webley and I will shoot myself!


Caco

[Boac]

A noble gentleman to the end, Caco - we will miss you. I'll make sure Cape comes to the funeral.....

[ian16th]

Not a Lightning pilot, but Diana Barnarto piloted a Lightning!

[Undried Plum]

there were never any female RAF Lightning pilots

Solo, around the world? Surely not.

She deserves a medal for that porkie, Shirley

Let's meet over dinner.

[Sisemen]

My heart was never in the job whenever I had to process an S10 letter for EMWD when in the RAF. (Those that have been there and got the T shirt will be able to decode that one )

[Undried Plum]

Solo, around the world? Surely not.

She deserves a medal for that porkie, Shirley

But she's got a Flying Badge and everyfing. She's the real deal. Innshe?

[ExSp33db1rd]

........enforced changes of base etc. etc.

Yes, whilst on a 3 month Aus. posting ( voluntary, not enfored ) one of my so called "colleagues" took a shine to Mrs. ExS Mk. 1 ultimately breaking up two families. He's dead now, and I didn't go to the funeral ! I might have performed a celebratory dance on his coffin - I won !

I also managed to get him rejected by the airline that I moved to, partly of a consequence of his actions, and to whom he subsequently also applied after initial retirement.

Revenge is sweet, Don't Get Mad, Get Even.

A million years later, prior to a major colo-rectal cancer operation in NZ, my young surgeon, clearly English, advised that I would have to undergo an ECG before the start, did I know what that was ? Do I know what it is ? I endured one every 6 months during my career as a pilot. Oh,who did you work for? XXXXX Oh, did you know Capt. XX ? Did I know Capt XX !! he was the bastard that started screwing my wife in my absence at work, why ? I was best mate of his son at school, and well remember the distress caused to the family at that time. Small World. I got good service in the Operating Theatre !!

[Cacophonix]

Not a Lightning pilot, but Diana Barnarto piloted a Lightning!

First British woman to go supersonic as you say ian16th. Related to Barney Barnato of Kimberley diamond field fame and Rhodes's big rival. Kimberley, being where, coincidentally, my ex-wife comes from.

Caco

[Ex-Ascot]

When I joined the Royal Air Force, later than many of you guys (1978) if you didn't have a wife you didn't progress. There was no way you could be a Stn Cdr without a wife. Your wife's performance in the OM flower club went on your annual report. 1st wife was very supportive and helped immensely but I couldn't live with her. Married for 14 years but in effect only half of that with time spent away. With Mrs Ex-Ascot now for 25 years. Lived and worked together for 21 of those, 24 hrs a day, only apart when she goes into the supermarket which I am not allowed in - apparently a distraction. it seems that one is not allowed to chuck things in and out of trolleys and have a stop watch running on the operation. We are known here as the couple who are never seen apart and always on time. And, God help anyone who is late.

[Boac]

Married for 14 years but in effect only half of that with time spent away. With Mrs Ex-Ascot now for 25 years. Lived and worked together for 21 of those, 24 hrs a day,

- that really sums up the difficulty a newly-wed couple have in the services. My kids 'grew up' until their early teens with a stranger who threw dirty clothes in the front door (and green smarties on the lawn....) and was known as 'daddy'. It is a tribute to memsahibs everywhere that they sometimes survive.

[ian16th]

I was one of the lucky ones.

I did all of my gadding about while I was single.

Got married in the June, accompanied passage on posting to Akrotiri, excepting Duty Dog and Duty Fitter nights on base, I had 1 week detachment in Karachi.

Claim to fame, I was Ord Cpl 23rd Dec 1963. The night the Greeks & Turks started shooting at each other.

Last 6 months back at Marham as my posting of choice and then demob.

No kids until settled and stable in civilian life.