Covid - 19: How is it affecting you?

[Undried Plum]

Damn!

That bint's longitudinal W&B datapoint is a sight to behold.

[Pontius Navigator]

Must say, the gent in the left in the black shirt looks very dapper. I wonder if Mr Ex-A recognised what that is around his neck

[Ex-Ascot]

Damn!

That bint's longitudinal W&B datapoint is a sight to behold.

That is probably why she is a senior manageress. Go into a government office and the bigger the boobs and backside the more senior they are - serious.

Not with you PN

[Rossian]

I think that it is part of the "watermark" printed on the photo.
Re the manageress, who Alexander MaCaull Smith would describe as a "traditionally built African woman"

The Ancient Mariner

[Ex-Ascot]

Absolutely AM. Our good friend the manageress from the safari camp up river is 'traditionally built'. She can't walk through town without constant complimentary comments from the local chaps. Not lewd though.

[Undried Plum]

Damn!

That bint's longitudinal W&B datapoint is a sight to behold.

That is probably why she is a senior manageress. Go into a government office and the bigger the boobs and backside the more senior they are - serious.

Now you mention it, I do remember that the senior NPF wumman in the oil company office known as Industrial Area in Port Harcourt had a similar fore and aft counterbalance configuration, and in a similar blouse-busting and skirt-ripping quantity.

She was only a Sergeant, but she was definitely Queen Bee in reception and within the tame squad of NPF that we had in Eastern Region. Even the male Inspectors of the NPF seemed to defer to her. Never thought about it at the time, but now I realise it may be a cultural thing in sub-Saharan Africa.

See? I learn stuff here, even when discussing a wee virus that has got **** to do with big tits and fat arses.

[TheGreenGoblin]

This very odd hiatus in the affairs of people, occasioned by too much time on one's hands and cabin fever, has resulted in many of my friends and acquaintances seemingly completely losing the plot, whereas I lost the plot years ago, and embracing strange illogical modes of thought!

I received a WhatsApp video from a South African friend in lockdown in Saudi Arabia who temporarily claimed it is proof that the Chinese were surreptitiously landing troops and arms in South Africa!

- WhatsApp video taken from a shell garage, either at dawn or dusk showing low bed trailers carrying tanks / armoured vehicles under tarps. The intimation is that it is recent and the voices are clearly South African, "n m@erse klomp tenke".

- Sound bite speaking of the first thousands of Chinese Troops disembarking at Cape Town with "hundreds of armoured cars and tank"?

A smidgen of research showed that what was claimed was fallacious at every level and that the video was actually filmed in Namibia and showed a consignment of armoured vehicles purchased from a Swiss company en route to Botswana, having been shipped to the nearest port to that landlocked country!

I even found a photo of the supposedly"Chinese" vehicles being shipped via Germany...

https://www.defenceweb.co.za/featured/b ... a-namibia/


Sigh... This virus has addled our brains...

Tanks, big boobs, gargantuan black bottoms... What is next?

[Capetonian]

I don't think lockdown is a factor. I have a friend who for the last 20 years has done nothing but look at conspiracy TV programmes and videos, and there's plenty out there. He then tries to convince me to believe this bilge.

[TheGreenGoblin]

I don't think lockdown is a factor. I have a friend who for the last 20 years has done nothing but look at conspiracy TV programmes and videos, and there's plenty out there. He then tries to convince me to believe this bilge.

True, the conspiracy garbage has been endemic but I suspect that the current zeitgeist has fuelled the tenor of these fables in the sense that the tanks in the case noted above had to be Chinese etc. and the 5G masts cause Coronavirus symptoms etc.

[Pontius Navigator]

Ex+A, it was a gentle dig at your presumed informal rig in Botswana with that immaculate turnout in suit.

[TheGreenGoblin]

Ex+A, it was a gentle dig at your presumed informal rig in Botswana with that immaculate turnout in suit.

Having, sadly, only once ever having had the opportunity, of meeting Ex Ascot and his amazing missus, I can say that his rig, gig and even, his wig (I tease), are immaculate. Can you ever expect anything less of one of Her Majesty's Royal aerial chauffeurs...

[Pontius Navigator]

TGG, exactly, we always wear what is suitable for the occasion. The officer court martialed for not wearing any clothes was acquitted on the grounds that he was correctly attired for the activity in which he was currently engsged. (Allegedly)

[Ex-Ascot]

Ex+A, it was a gentle dig at your presumed informal rig in Botswana with that immaculate turnout in suit.

Daily rig is safari shirt. shorts and sandals. Official functions tropical suit and tie. Court appearances or similar pinstriped suit and tie. I have actually got my morning suit here in case the President invites me for breakfast and No.5s here if I have to stay for dinner.

Senior local management here wear suit (shiny) tie and pointy shoes.

Have to go and get a permit now to go into town next week as we are outside the town zone. Just before lunch last Friday seemed a good time.

[llondel]

Have to go and get a permit now to go into town next week as we are outside the town zone. Just before lunch last Friday seemed a good time.

Where do you have to go to get the permit? Into town?

[CharlieOneSix]

Just had a telephone call from a volunteer at the Grampian Coronavirus Assistance Hub. They said they were calling all those in Grampian who are on the "Shielding" list in their area to see how we are coping and asking whether we needed anything. I think that's fantastic - so good to see a proactive activity such as this. We are fine as we are on Sainsburys priority delivery list, we have a proactive GP who has checked up on us and even though we are restricted to not leaving the premises at least we have our fields where we can keep active with dog walking etc.

[Pontius Navigator]

even though we are restricted to not leaving the premises at least we have our fields where we can keep active with dog walking

We are in the same situation. While it was suggested that one X one hour's exercise was sufficient it was never a hard limit now there is no limit. However at the same time, as old and decrepit, we were supposed to stay at home. Did that mean no exercise?

From mid-March to early May we remained at home and a neighbour did shopping and walked the dog. As our area turned out to be lower risk and we have miles of footpaths around the fields I think lack of exercise poses a greater risk to my long term health than complete isolation.

Walking the dog at 7am it is easy to observe social distancing, usually in hundreds of yards. In more constricted areas everyone uses the opposite side of the road.

[Ex-Ascot]

Have to go and get a permit now to go into town next week as we are outside the town zone. Just before lunch last Friday seemed a good time.

Where do you have to go to get the permit? Into town?

No, from the Chief's tribal office in the village (5 kms away). It is all a complete pain. Have to wear trousers, girlies dress or skirt (strict etiquette), masks and wash hands at the entrance. Then possibly queue for hours. Anyway CID wanted us at the hospital today for DNA tests. The line on the map says that we are 8 kms outside the town zone so need a permit. CID said that we are within the town zone so we just drove in and were not stopped. Told him if we were arrested I would phone him.

Still no news on booze shops opening. CID lady today said that we can go to street bars but only drink the beer there not take it away. Absolute *****. Many of the population do not drink so have no idea what is happening.

We understand that cigarettes are available on the black market in town. Not heard about booze though. Anyway, production line still going on the hooch at home.

Face masks are compulsory. Half the police at the cop shop not wearing them or round their necks, same at the hospital.

[Undried Plum]

Here in the Sheeple's Republic of Jockistan we have a wee relaxation coming up on the 28th (Thursday).

We will be allowed to visit , and/or be visited by, chums. Only one household at a time, so no proper parties and crowded pissups, but at least we can converse as yumans without electronic gizmology as a medium.

Me bbq pit is rusty ffs. I'll have to give it a good scrubbing and a test flight once this stormyy wx dies down.

[4mastacker]

Test drove the bbq today despite the wind. The charcoal didn't last very long in the draught, could have smelted iron it was that hot.

[Woody]

Had a new bbq delivered during the week, one trial run so far, probably going to have to use more charcoal next time, everything was cooked through, just took ages.

Ps- it’s a Weber, which should keep the MAGA members happy.