The really boring and totally pointless snippets thread V

[Ex-Ascot]

Morning folks. Rain first thing before dawn Now sunny. 'erbert now stealing fencing material. Little sh1t.

[Boac]

Zu viele bumsen macht die Beine schwach = Too much shagging makes your legs weak.

bumsen
I think you might be doing your shagging wrong

It might depend on how far one has to walk for it?

[limeygal]

Hydro-beautiful.

Too much shagging makes your legs weak.

What we used to call a knee trembler?

Warming up here. Putting D3 to work raking leaves. Back garden looking great. Only side patio and front garden left!

[Wodrick]

It's Another Friday.

G’day

9°c currently. In cloud, 3cm wetness overnight, still raining
Billy the Sooth predicts 16°c. Been wrong all week so far.

Took the oppurtunity to make Tomato Jam, think it is just about ready to set, it was very reluctant to reduce yesterday.

[Woody]

For those that are able Blazing Saddles is available on BBC IPlayer for the next month, as it was shown last night as a 50th anniversary celebration

[Wodrick]

Arghhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!
The kitchen ceiling (under the roof terrace i.e.flat) is leaking the paint is bubbling.
There is always something.

[OFSO]

Yes there is, and thanks to our wives we are always reminded of the something. It's 18 months since I put off fixing the defunct kitchen extractor hood motor ...as was pointed out to me this week.....

[Wodrick]

I have nesting birds in mine, it's jammed with the nest.

[Boac]

Poof is another German coloquilism for a brothel.

Zu viele bumsen macht die Beine schwach = Too much shagging makes your legs weak.

Could there be any correlation with the spate of knee issues we are seeing on the site..........?

[1DC]

Afraid I have to break the cycle, my knees are a bit dodgy and a shag is lost in the distant memory somewhere! I have fixed the garage door opener, I went and squirted the gubbins in the garage with WD40 and then polished it until it looked all nice and clean and not a cobweb in sight. The door opens and closes without problem from the house now..
Mrs 1DC has gone on a cleaning fetish, she decided that my shirt cupboard needed a tidy. All shirts removed cupboard soojied out about half shirts replaced and the balance are destined for the tip or charity shop, I was allowed to be involved in the decision. These are worrying times, when she gets in one of these moods she is on the borderline between staying sane and throwing a wobbler, all the familiar go on full alert while we see what the next decision is going to be.Hopefully she will get over it, one of her best mates is in hospital for a dicy operation I think that has triggered it.

[Ex-Ascot]

For those that are able Blazing Saddles is available on BBC IPlayer for the next month, as it was shown last night as a 50th anniversary celebration

I remember the premier in Manchester next to our school. Cowboys on horses on Deansgate and free bowls of baked beans outside the cinema. After Wodders' time.

[Woody]

Attended a funeral this morning, mainly due to knowing the family members from Church, I knew that he worked for the Royal Family, but after starting on the Brittania, he seems to have become involved in Her Majesty’s travel arrangements, so I was wondering if Ex-A ever came across Frank Holland, during his time at 10 Squadron?

[llondel]

I learned yesterday that I can hear the upstairs smoke alarms even when tucked in my corner of the house furthest from them. My wife had been cooking something and had turned off the cooker ring (so she thought) and went out to do some gardening, while listening to an audio book on headphones. Except it wasn't turned off, it was turned on full. Obvious results, conversion of pan contents into carbon and smoke, and the smoke alarm woke up and did its thing. I could smell it as I headed up the stairs, and sure enough, kitchen full of smoke and two upset dogs. Turned the ring off, moved the pan to a cool spot, turned on the cooker extractor fan and went out to find my wife to tell her what had just happened.

[OFSO]

We demonstrated in front of a independent witness today that our (newish) Turkish cooker obeys Sharia Law. The rings will light but not stay lit when in inferior being (as they would have it) tries to start them. When a man (me) pushes the button they work perfectly.

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

Did you have to fit it facing east?
Does it not work during the day during Ramadan?
Has it tried to sink any of the bathtub boats yet?

[Karearea]

For those that are able Blazing Saddles is available on BBC IPlayer for the next month, as it was shown last night as a 50th anniversary celebration

What they said:

BBC iPlayer only works in the UK. Sorry, it’s due to rights issues.

Curses! foiled again!

[Fox3WheresMyBanana]

"Rights issues? We don't need no stinking rights issues!"

[PHXPhlyer]

Found this on YouTube.
Unfortunately, it runs backwards.
WTH?



PP

[G-CPTN]

That's novel!

[PHXPhlyer]

11 AM
8 PM

PP