Got a problem.

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Alisoncc
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Got a problem.

#1 Post by Alisoncc » Tue Oct 01, 2019 4:38 am

I live in a complex of a dozen townhouses spread around a central driveway separated by lots of grass. Whilst we have sturdy fences around the outer perimeter, there are no internal fences at all. Dog gets on with everyone and regularly visits all of the resident "retirees". It's a great easy-going environment.

The last month I haven't been the best healthwise so a neighbour has been walking dog most days. The problem is on returning from their walk dog then spends all day with this neighbour. I'm only getting to see her at feeding time, and bed time.

Don't want to upset dog by tying her up all day. I occasionally put her on a 2mtr leash on the front patio. But she just sits there looking very sad as she does enjoy socialising with all the neighbours. Don't want to upset the neighbour who walks her, he is helping me out by doing so, and if I say anything he will take it the wrong way. He's a bit funny that way. Mentioned it a while back, and his response was "it's between me and dog".

Currently getting very pissed off, as dog was intended as a companion for me, and all I seem to be doing is picking up the tab. $110 the other day for tick, flea and worm tabs for six months, plus doing a poo patrol every few days.

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Sisemen
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Re: Got a problem.

#2 Post by Sisemen » Tue Oct 01, 2019 5:23 am

Honestly ask yourself “What’s best for the dog?”

And be prepared for an answer that might not be to your liking!

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Alisoncc
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Re: Got a problem.

#3 Post by Alisoncc » Tue Oct 01, 2019 5:35 am

Why? That's a silly reply. Only had her four months, the other day gave thought to returning her to the pound. I didn't adopt her for some altruistic reason, saving rescue dogs from an uncertain future. I live on my own and adopted her for what she could add to my life. Solely going around with a pooper scooper daily wasn't part of my plan.
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Capetonian
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Re: Got a problem.

#4 Post by Capetonian » Tue Oct 01, 2019 7:30 am

Your dog sounds more like a cat, selfish beasts that they are.

Whilst appreciating what you've said about upsetting the neighbour, he may be feeding her, in which case ask him to desist.

Difficult I know. Good luck.
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Sisemen
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Re: Got a problem.

#5 Post by Sisemen » Tue Oct 01, 2019 2:10 pm

OK. So, you didn’t want advice, you actually wanted confirmation of your solution. [-X :D

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Re: Got a problem.

#6 Post by Pontius Navigator » Tue Oct 01, 2019 2:33 pm

Your neighbour is obviously giving your dog something that it wants. Besides taking the dog for walks, and possibly feeding it, does he have toys or plays with her?

Our dog is also very sociable and would visit with our neighbours and definitely play with their animals - two cats and a dog. When we visit relations, they all have dogs, she has a great time but does like her own home and routine.

Your dog has its routine too but that happens to include socialising with your neighbour. Maybe you should get the dog immediately after its walk and take it for a drive; give it me-time; get it to give you me-time too.

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Re: Got a problem.

#7 Post by llondel » Tue Oct 01, 2019 7:43 pm

Dogs are pack animals, they like company and interactions. I'm considered to be an animal magnet, all the pets in the house gravitate towards me if I'm around because I tend to be the one feeding the cats and walking the dogs, and will go sit on the floor and give attention to one or two (or three, but they have to share two hands) spontaneously. My son has asked on more than one occasion why they prefer me to him, so I point it out to him. It's starting to sink in with him finally, I've seen him take time to interact more with them instead of being plugged into his computer games.

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Mrs Ex-Ascot
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Re: Got a problem.

#8 Post by Mrs Ex-Ascot » Thu Oct 03, 2019 1:30 pm

PN made a very good point. Maybe you should make it clear to your friend that while you appreciate his help she is your dog not his. I would suggest that you ask him to return your dog to your house at the end of each walk. Perhaps the offer of a cup of tea or coffee together before he returns to his house alone would make things a bit easier. Also there may be no harm in keeping her indoors or tied outside keeping you company instead of letting her go walk- a bout. Hope you find a solution to this problem. :YMHUG:
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Re: Got a problem.

#9 Post by Alisoncc » Fri Oct 04, 2019 7:06 pm

Excuse delay in responding - Sorreee. Thanks for all the replies that have helped. I've been trying to think through what the issue really is, and how I can resolve it. Plus been pushing myself really hard physically so that I can resume walking the dog myself.

I think Mrs Ex-A hit the nail on the head. I've been putting the dog outside believing it was better for it, fresh air, sunshine, etc. whereas dog probably thinks I was punishing it by locking it away from me whilst I stayed inside. So dog wanders off looking for company. Bit like when I was a kid, parents would chase us off out of the house. Healthier playing outside than in. Dog probably didn't know the difference.

Put one of her beds in the kitchen, and she happily snoozes away whilst I potter around doing chores. So thanks everyone. Just needed to be thought through.

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