St Valentine's Day

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TheGreenGoblin
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St Valentine's Day

#1 Post by TheGreenGoblin » Thu Feb 13, 2020 12:30 pm

As it is a rather slack day at Castle Goblin, I have been pretending to work and posting here and alternately listening to BBC Radio 4 and was highly amused to hear this programme about love letters and the lady interviewer who spoke to an American lady who is a professional love letter writer (mostly for blokes let the truth be told). :))

Cyrano for hire...

What an admirable profession! Will people here exchange a billet-doux with the apple of their eye tomorrow and what will folks here be doing tomorrow to show their appreciation of the same apple?

I shall be using this auto love letter generator...

https://www.letter-generator.org.uk/create.php?type=5

I generated this fine piece of prose...
Dear XXX,

I have a small confession. Forgive this pouring of my heart.

I cherish Cardiff, where we first met. The moment I clapped eyes on you, I knew you were going to be a sweet girl. Recently, I have began to regard you as much more than just a girl.

My feelings for you intensified when I saw you dancing in the moonlight. I was further wowed by your tremendous walking skills.

You have legs like gritty sprouts and the most wholesome nose I've ever seen. When I look at you, I just want to kiss those gritty sprout legs and rub that wholesome nose.

You're so special with your kind ways. The way you handle your humorous fist shows great kindness and firmness.

I know that to you I'm just a nincompoop fool but I think we could be happy together, playing like two tall dogs.
Hmm! :))

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#2 Post by fin » Thu Feb 13, 2020 3:31 pm

TheGreenGoblin wrote:
Thu Feb 13, 2020 12:30 pm
As it is a rather slack day at Castle Goblin, I have been pretending to work and posting here and alternately listening to BBC Radio 4 and was highly amused to hear this programme about love letters and the lady interviewer who spoke to an American lady who is a professional love letter writer (mostly for blokes let the truth be told). :))

Cyrano for hire...

What an admirable profession! Will people here exchange a billet-doux with the apple of their eye tomorrow and what will folks here be doing tomorrow to show their appreciation of the same apple?

I shall be using this auto love letter generator...

https://www.letter-generator.org.uk/create.php?type=5

I generated this fine piece of prose...
Dear XXX,

I have a small confession. Forgive this pouring of my heart.

I cherish Cardiff, where we first met. The moment I clapped eyes on you, I knew you were going to be a sweet girl. Recently, I have began to regard you as much more than just a girl.

My feelings for you intensified when I saw you dancing in the moonlight. I was further wowed by your tremendous walking skills.

You have legs like gritty sprouts and the most wholesome nose I've ever seen. When I look at you, I just want to kiss those gritty sprout legs and rub that wholesome nose.

You're so special with your kind ways. The way you handle your humorous fist shows great kindness and firmness.

I know that to you I'm just a nincompoop fool but I think we could be happy together, playing like two tall dogs.
Hmm! :))
Ha. Found myself expecting and anticipating the typical response from Cape! =))
Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#3 Post by TheGreenGoblin » Fri Feb 14, 2020 7:39 am

Not even one curmudgeonly post which is evidence of pervasive curmudgeonliness or some other silly word like that. :)

I bought my beloved a card from me and the dog and am taking her to a jazz evening in the local town hall tonight. I may quaff an ale or two. Can't say fairer or more romantic than that!

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#4 Post by Boac » Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:02 am

Does your dog liike jazz.....? :))

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#5 Post by Capetonian » Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:04 am

I'm not of a romantic bent. I bought the boss flowers last week, for no particular reason other that I happened to have stopped to refuel my car opposite a florist, and was immediately assailed with : "What have you done?"
"Religion is the advertising campaign for something that doesn't exist."
The late Clive James

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#6 Post by TheGreenGoblin » Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:56 am

Boac wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:02 am
Does your dog liike jazz.....? :))
The dog likes trad jazz! The better half had a huge fight with me in Ronnie Scott's many years ago and so I have not attended a jazz concert with her since then. Tonight is a calculated risk. I suspect she was the one that sent me this this morning... =))

says it all really.JPG
says it all really.JPG (38.06 KiB) Viewed 213 times

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#7 Post by barkingmad » Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:56 am

“Roses are red, violets are glorious, Never creep up on Oscar Pistorious!”

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#8 Post by TheGreenGoblin » Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:13 am

Maybe Howard Hawks had it right on the whole Valentine's day thing...?


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Re: St Valentine's Day

#9 Post by ribrash » Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:14 am

The only day when its cheaper to buy cocaine than flowers. =))
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Re: St Valentine's Day

#10 Post by 4mastacker » Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:23 am

ribrash wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:14 am
The only day when its cheaper to buy cocaine than flowers. =))

..and how do you know this? ;)))
It's always my fault - SWMBO

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#11 Post by ribrash » Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:43 am

4mastacker wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:23 am
ribrash wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:14 am
The only day when its cheaper to buy cocaine than flowers. =))

..and how do you know this? ;)))
...err can I get back to you on this... :-bd
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Re: St Valentine's Day

#12 Post by Woody » Fri Feb 14, 2020 11:09 am

ribrash wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:14 am
The only day when its cheaper to buy cocaine than flowers. =))
The advantages of living near Birkenhead :ymdevil:
Can the last person to leave,please feed the cat.

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#13 Post by Woody » Fri Feb 14, 2020 11:18 am

For all the romantics on the site :)

Can the last person to leave,please feed the cat.

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#14 Post by ribrash » Fri Feb 14, 2020 2:59 pm

Woody wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 11:09 am
ribrash wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:14 am
The only day when its cheaper to buy cocaine than flowers. =))
The advantages of living near Birkenhead :ymdevil:
=)) =)) :-bd
D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#15 Post by TheGreenGoblin » Fri Feb 14, 2020 11:49 pm

Boac wrote:
Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:02 am
Does your dog liike jazz.....? :))

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#16 Post by Boac » Sat Feb 15, 2020 8:39 am

Well, I guess she would enjoy a husky voice?

I regret that music would be classified as 'bum music' by Mrs B - she once saw a comedy sketch where the comedian played a similar tune with his bum......... :))

Could you ask your dog what the canine link is please - 1:31 is too long to trawl for it - and who were the two burks who leapt to their feet at the opening?

You can probably detect that that sort of music is not to this Philistine's taste :))

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#17 Post by Woody » Sat Feb 15, 2020 8:50 am

No reports on the jazz evening from TGG, did he survive, was the dog happy, we need to know :D
Can the last person to leave,please feed the cat.

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#18 Post by Capetonian » Sat Feb 15, 2020 10:01 am

I know at least one of our audience will appreciate this. To others it may be largely unintelligible.
A South African Valentine's poem...🥰
Author unknown.

I smaak you stukkend, please say you'll be mine
You're my moon, my stars, my North Beach sunshine
You're my beaded love-letter, my breeze in the night
You're my rooibos, my koeksister, my blitz firelight
You make me feel better, you have the know-how
I smaak you even more than Durb's bunny-chow
You're my lamb-chop, my ribbetjies, my dröe wors et al
You're my Mrs Balls chutney, my samoosa Halaal
One smile from you and I float to the sky
I feel like the Springboks have just scored a try
You're my chilli, my roti, my eskimo pies
I'd rather have you than the Lotto first prize
And this letter my skattie, is only the start
'Cos you've taken the cable-car straight to my heart
You're my best friend, my lover, my very own wife
You're truly the tomato sauce on the slap chips of my life
"Religion is the advertising campaign for something that doesn't exist."
The late Clive James

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Re: St Valentine's Day

#19 Post by Boac » Sat Feb 15, 2020 10:07 am

Woody wrote:No reports on the jazz evening from TGG, did he survive, was the dog happy, we need to know :D
I suspect he may have sealed his fate with
"I suspect she was the one that sent me this this morning..."

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